How to Cook Husbands

Nonfiction, Religion & Spirituality, New Age, History, Fiction & Literature
Cover of the book How to Cook Husbands by Elizabeth Strong Worthington, Library of Alexandria
View on Amazon View on AbeBooks View on Kobo View on B.Depository View on eBay View on Walmart
Author: Elizabeth Strong Worthington ISBN: 9781465502421
Publisher: Library of Alexandria Publication: March 8, 2015
Imprint: Language: English
Author: Elizabeth Strong Worthington
ISBN: 9781465502421
Publisher: Library of Alexandria
Publication: March 8, 2015
Imprint:
Language: English
A while ago I came across a newspaper clipping—a recipe written by a Baltimore lady—that had long lain dormant in my desk. It ran as follows: “A great many husbands are spoiled by mismanagement. Some women go about it as if their husbands were bladders, and blow them up; Others keep them constantly in hot water; Others let them freeze, by their carelessness and indifference. Some keep them in a stew, by irritating ways and words; Others roast them; some keep them in pickle all their lives. Now it is not to be supposed that any husband will be good, managed in this way—turnips wouldn’t; onions wouldn’t; cabbage-heads wouldn’t, and husbands won’t; but they are really delicious when properly treated. “In selecting your husband you should not be guided by the silvery appearance, as in buying mackerel, or by the golden tint, as if you wanted salmon. Be sure to select him yourself, as taste differs. And by the way, don’t go to market for him, as the best are always brought to your door. “It is far better to have none, unless you patiently learn to cook him. A preserving kettle of the finest porcelain is the best, but if you have nothing but an earthenware pipkin, it will do, with care. “See that the linen, in which you wrap him, is nicely washed and mended, with the required amount of buttons and strings, nicely sewed on. Tie him in the kettle with a strong cord called Comfort, as the one called Duty is apt to be weak. They sometimes fly out of the kettle, and become burned and crusty on the edges, since, like crabs and oysters, you have to cook them alive
View on Amazon View on AbeBooks View on Kobo View on B.Depository View on eBay View on Walmart
A while ago I came across a newspaper clipping—a recipe written by a Baltimore lady—that had long lain dormant in my desk. It ran as follows: “A great many husbands are spoiled by mismanagement. Some women go about it as if their husbands were bladders, and blow them up; Others keep them constantly in hot water; Others let them freeze, by their carelessness and indifference. Some keep them in a stew, by irritating ways and words; Others roast them; some keep them in pickle all their lives. Now it is not to be supposed that any husband will be good, managed in this way—turnips wouldn’t; onions wouldn’t; cabbage-heads wouldn’t, and husbands won’t; but they are really delicious when properly treated. “In selecting your husband you should not be guided by the silvery appearance, as in buying mackerel, or by the golden tint, as if you wanted salmon. Be sure to select him yourself, as taste differs. And by the way, don’t go to market for him, as the best are always brought to your door. “It is far better to have none, unless you patiently learn to cook him. A preserving kettle of the finest porcelain is the best, but if you have nothing but an earthenware pipkin, it will do, with care. “See that the linen, in which you wrap him, is nicely washed and mended, with the required amount of buttons and strings, nicely sewed on. Tie him in the kettle with a strong cord called Comfort, as the one called Duty is apt to be weak. They sometimes fly out of the kettle, and become burned and crusty on the edges, since, like crabs and oysters, you have to cook them alive

More books from Library of Alexandria

Cover of the book A Hind Let Loose Or, an Historical Representation of The Testimonies of The Church of Scotland for The interest of Christ With The True State Thereof in All Its Periods by Elizabeth Strong Worthington
Cover of the book American Adventures: A Second Trip 'Abroad at Home' by Elizabeth Strong Worthington
Cover of the book The Gold Brick and the Gold Mine: Fake Mining Schemes That Steal the People's Savings by Elizabeth Strong Worthington
Cover of the book St. Nicholas: His Legend and His Role in the Christmas Celebration and Other Popular Customs by Elizabeth Strong Worthington
Cover of the book Facino Cane by Elizabeth Strong Worthington
Cover of the book Dutch Life in Town and Country by Elizabeth Strong Worthington
Cover of the book The Lost Word: A Christmas Legend of Long Ago by Elizabeth Strong Worthington
Cover of the book Les Derniers Jours De Pékin by Elizabeth Strong Worthington
Cover of the book Bertha, Our Little German Cousin by Elizabeth Strong Worthington
Cover of the book With the Allies to Pekin: A Tale of the Relief of the Legations by Elizabeth Strong Worthington
Cover of the book L'assommoir by Elizabeth Strong Worthington
Cover of the book Hopalong Cassidy by Elizabeth Strong Worthington
Cover of the book The Historical Romances of Georg Ebers by Elizabeth Strong Worthington
Cover of the book Indian Tribes of the Upper Missouri Edited With Notes and Biographical Sketch by Elizabeth Strong Worthington
Cover of the book Erema: My Father's Sin by Elizabeth Strong Worthington
We use our own "cookies" and third party cookies to improve services and to see statistical information. By using this website, you agree to our Privacy Policy