Killing the Goose That Laid the Golden Eggs

Fiction & Literature, Humorous
Cover of the book Killing the Goose That Laid the Golden Eggs by Robert Kemppainen, Robert Kemppainen
View on Amazon View on AbeBooks View on Kobo View on B.Depository View on eBay View on Walmart
Author: Robert Kemppainen ISBN: 9781370973705
Publisher: Robert Kemppainen Publication: February 15, 2018
Imprint: Smashwords Edition Language: English
Author: Robert Kemppainen
ISBN: 9781370973705
Publisher: Robert Kemppainen
Publication: February 15, 2018
Imprint: Smashwords Edition
Language: English

Killing the Goose That Laid the Golden Eggs is simply my reaction to the numerous Killing books that have been written by Mr. Bill O'Reilly and Mr. Martin Dugard. It is a light-hearted look at one possible way this story might have come about, written in a feeble imitation of the style of those books. Mr. O'Reilly and Mr. Dugard took their task of writing very seriously, spending countless hours studying, composing, revising and reviewing and they took their job quite seriously. I, on the other hand, am a little lazy and quite shameless. This book is anything but serious and way, way shorter than their books. But I had fun writing it and I hope you will have fun reading it too.
-James "Pillow" Wryly
Excerpt
Samantha Goose ducked her head into the murky water. Though geese mostly eat green vegetation and grain, they also, on occasion, will eat insect and small fish. And the minnows lurking in the shallow water of the pond looked particularly succulent. She grabbed the nearest, fattest chub, and in one quick motion, pulled her head from the water, tossed it back and let her catch slide smoothly down her throat. The water from her head and neck sloshed freely down on her folded wings where it rolled off like, well, like water off a goose’s back. With a self-satisfied waggle of her tail feathers, she paddled on, seeking more tasty tidbits beneath the shining surface,
Little did she know that she had just three days to live.

View on Amazon View on AbeBooks View on Kobo View on B.Depository View on eBay View on Walmart

Killing the Goose That Laid the Golden Eggs is simply my reaction to the numerous Killing books that have been written by Mr. Bill O'Reilly and Mr. Martin Dugard. It is a light-hearted look at one possible way this story might have come about, written in a feeble imitation of the style of those books. Mr. O'Reilly and Mr. Dugard took their task of writing very seriously, spending countless hours studying, composing, revising and reviewing and they took their job quite seriously. I, on the other hand, am a little lazy and quite shameless. This book is anything but serious and way, way shorter than their books. But I had fun writing it and I hope you will have fun reading it too.
-James "Pillow" Wryly
Excerpt
Samantha Goose ducked her head into the murky water. Though geese mostly eat green vegetation and grain, they also, on occasion, will eat insect and small fish. And the minnows lurking in the shallow water of the pond looked particularly succulent. She grabbed the nearest, fattest chub, and in one quick motion, pulled her head from the water, tossed it back and let her catch slide smoothly down her throat. The water from her head and neck sloshed freely down on her folded wings where it rolled off like, well, like water off a goose’s back. With a self-satisfied waggle of her tail feathers, she paddled on, seeking more tasty tidbits beneath the shining surface,
Little did she know that she had just three days to live.

More books from Humorous

Cover of the book Мережкин и кот by Robert Kemppainen
Cover of the book Prometheus Fit To Be Tied by Robert Kemppainen
Cover of the book Showbiz by Robert Kemppainen
Cover of the book Inspecteur Wang by Robert Kemppainen
Cover of the book A Cross to Bare by Robert Kemppainen
Cover of the book Padre Cocaïne by Robert Kemppainen
Cover of the book Teasing the Princess by Robert Kemppainen
Cover of the book Cat Patrol Delta, Episode #4: Enemy of My Enemy by Robert Kemppainen
Cover of the book City of Grace by Robert Kemppainen
Cover of the book The Case of the Missing Sapphire by Robert Kemppainen
Cover of the book The People We Hate at the Wedding by Robert Kemppainen
Cover of the book Unidentified Funny Objects by Robert Kemppainen
Cover of the book Million Dollar Puppeteers by Robert Kemppainen
Cover of the book Stories from The Delux by Robert Kemppainen
Cover of the book Access Code by Robert Kemppainen
We use our own "cookies" and third party cookies to improve services and to see statistical information. By using this website, you agree to our Privacy Policy